Cry Me A River

Let Them Cry

I used to think I had to be the strong mom. That I couldn’t cry in front of my daughters because what message would that send?

Would it make them feel unsafe or even scared? 

One day, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I was tired, overwhelmed and angry. I fell into real, raw tears while my daughter watched.

But she didn’t look scared. She didn’t turn away. She just climbed into my lap and hugged me. It was almost like she was saying “It’s okay, Mommy, I see you.” 

From that moment on, I realized showing emotion isn't a weakness. It’s modeling that we live in an environment where it’s safe to express ourselves. I decided I want to show them that crying is allowed. That joy, sadness, anger and fear all belong in our house.

So when they cry, I let them. Not in your traditional “cry it out methods”. When they cry, I don’t hush them or rush them to feel better. I don’t distract them from those feelings with snacks or songs. I sit with them. I show them that big feelings are always safe at home. 

I used to think that strength was holding it all in. Now I know real strength is letting it all out and staying soft anyway.

So let her cry, let him cry, let yourself cry.

It’s part of being human.